To agree to disagree on racism, sexism has become a cowardly cop-out: Age of Unreason
(The Star Toronto Raptors)

Scenario 1. You are at a party and someone brings up Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, featured on the cover of Rolling Stone. You think Trudeau is a shallow glam boy who uses photo-ops to distract from real issues. They think photo-ops are an effective gateway to discuss those issues. You argue back and forth. Neither of you changes your mind.You agree to disagree. The party goes on.Scenario 2. You are at a party and someone brings up racism or sexism and says those who say they are affected just have an affinity for victimhood.How do you respond? Do you fight back? You can agree to disagree on opinions, as Scenario 1 shows. Can you agree to disagree on facts? Can you agree to disagree when one set of lived experience (of not facing racism or sexism) is privileged over, and seen as more valid than, another set of lived experiences (of being systemically discriminated against)?Read more:Finding a way forward in our moment of truths: Age of UnreasonCan you agree to anything less than complete consensus when what’s at stake is your right to exist equitably in your skin and gender of choice?Fighting back creates awkwardness, something we are socially conditioned to avoid. So people hesitate to debate topics such racism or sexism because they’re afraid they’ll say the wrong thing, be shouted down no matter what they say, or be revictimized. Agreeing to disagree no longer comes after a debate goes around in circles.It comes before it’s even begun. What is supposed to be a mature end to a fruitless debate has turned into a passive-aggressive, fragility-catering, non-confrontational social censorship of facts, ideas and policies.Everybody wants a less threatening space in which to have those conversations. There is also lack of clarity on where to draw the line between “staying in your lane” and speaking up against injustice. “This keeps people apart because we do not have those challenging complex conversations around thin ...